A.M. Wilhelm | Female Perfection, Flaws Included
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Female Perfection, Flaws Included

I have a tiny patch of spider veins on the outside of my left calf. They appeared there during my pregnancy with my daughter who, incidentally, is going to college this year. This fact dates those bluish squiggles at nineteen-plus years. I could easily erase the jagged lines with a laser appointment. I’ve never had an estimate, but I’m sure it wouldn’t cost much since the area is so small. But I haven’t made the call and I’m not going to. I intend on keeping this flaw and it’s not because it arrived with the gift of my daughter. I’m keeping this flaw and several others because I believe that by retaining some imperfections instead of purchasing them all away I enhance my ability to love and accept myself as I am.


I do get some treatments: religious keratin, occasional Botox, strategic laser hair removal. And, I color my hair every four to six weeks. I have multiple lotions and potions that I use on a daily basis. Yet, I want to make sure these choices don’t define me. I don’t want to prohibit my use of beauty assistance on principle, insisting I “go natural.” Yet, I know I do not have to be flawless to be perfectly me. In fact, I feel more perfect when I choose for myself what is right for me–what will be assisted and what will not. In each of these choices I create an individualized beauty blend of nature and science, which is mine alone. I never want to feel like I must do a particular thing to make myself more attractive. I want to empower and honor myself. Always.


I’m not advocating or disavowing the use of science to enhance health and beauty. I’m simply sharing my thoughts on flaws, perfection, and personal choice. I’ve seen women who are gorgeous and clearly have taken advantage of every product and service available and others who are equally beautiful and have avoided all of them. The characteristic that makes them stunning is the comfort they have with who they are and the choices they’ve made. There is no aura of dogma around them. Neither, I must be physically perfect, nor I refuse to bow to society’s norms of beauty. Their decisions come from a place of internal power. This power is their aura and their gorgeousness.


I’m stronger because of my spider veins. Another woman might be stronger for getting them removed. We all have flaws. We all are perfect. Our beauty is in our connection to what we truly want. Considered choice, whatever the choice may be, aligns us with our enduring reservoirs of strength and beauty.

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